What's made you grumpy today?

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What's made you grumpy today?

A friend of mine had a K11 Micra..in common with many Japanese cars there's nothing stopping you leaving the the stalk in the main beam position as it's not click to toggle on/off, you push it forward then pull it back to deactivate.

He'd accidentally knocked it forward so whenever he turned the headlamps on it was main beam. Realising this was blinding everyone he would drive round in the dark on side lights thinking this was dipped beam and only put the headlights on on unlit stretches. He complained for some time the dipped beam was crap...he was driving round on 1 5w sidelight bulb (the other had popped). Mockery may have followed... although not as bad as girl from college who took her car to the garage 3 times with similar finger trouble.

But..to be fair in the case of my wife who has no interest in the automotive..there is one function that matters. "Auto"...also having a car with rear DRLs so she's not one of these running round in fog with no lights on the rear.. When she had her Micra she'd get 70% of the way back and only realise she'd not switched the lights on when she got to the unlit stretch out to ours but in her defence she was finishing work at 3am.
In the past I knew of many people who, as long as their cars started, and preferably stopped, they were happy;).
 
@StevenRB45 So turns out I am a Tit, there is a button on the panel in front of the gear stick which is to turn off the TCS. This isn't actually visable from how I am positioned when driving. Then again I did know it was there just forgot about it, probably only ever touched it once about 7 years ago when I got the car.

Looking in the manual There is about 2 pages dedicated to all the various magical brake assist programs that go on behind the scenes, but the button only turns off the Traction control.

Interestingly and possibly what @Pugglt Auld Jock found, it states that all 4 wheel have to be fitted with the same tires, if not any unexpected difference in the rolling circumference of the tires will result in the engine power being cut. I would imagine this is what was triggered by driving the front wheels off the ground with stationary back wheels it saw the difference in the rotation of the tires and cut the engine power.
Interestingly - or not? - if you drive down the road, keep the throttle applied with your right foot and brake with your left, as soon as the brake pedal is depressed the throttle is cut. Wonder if they do that to save the DSG auto box versions from left foot brakers?

To be fair I'm only aware of half of this stuff because I thought I better go through and have a look when it became clear the car was going to be more permanent than originally planned.

There's probably getting on for 100s of user adjustable things hidden in the touchscreen on a modern car that your average owner never touches.

"Have you considered your stereo center point sir? Do you want it focused on the driver or are you of a more socialist bent and believe all passengers should have a similar experience? Do you want your gauges to sweep when you first start up?" How long would sir like the lights to stay on after he's locked your car at night?" "How aggressive do you want your climate control to be?" "What colour do you want the background of the touchscreen to be?" "Would you like to use a photo as the background of the touchscreen?"..

Er yeah mate...no. I suspect they use the same software with different skins from the C3 up to Peugeot 508 and the DS branded cars but it's just amusing to see all that in a supermini.


Rolling circumference difference could get interesting with a space saver fitted presumably it can recognise that.
I think it likely that the "younger generation" will fine tune stuff like the audio but the majority won't. I'm always amazed at the number of people, who when you're talking to them, have very little or no idea what any of the dash warning displays mean. A very common one is the oil warning light (the little oil can sign) Many people I've talked to think it means they need to top up the oil level soon! Not that long ago I was out with my younger boy, in his Astra going 65/70 mph on the city bypass. Dad, says he, there's been a little light on the dashboard for a wee while now and it's not going out. It was the oil warning light! How long's it been lit I asked? Don't know, a few minutes anyway. I reasoned that if it really was lack of oil pressure we'd have been hearing the big ends making a bid for freedom by then and luckily we were just approaching a slip road, so I got him to come off the motorway and pull over. Oil level was fine as was water level and nothing was too hot. so we started her up again and drove gently to my house where i discovered it was a failed pressure switch, Phew! This experience quite surprised me because he's actually quite interested in his car - but not actually getting his hands dirty. My older boy I could understand as he has absolutely no interest in mechanical things whatsoever - plays the guitar beautifully though, can bring tears to my eyes! but I thought the younger one had more of a grip on things than he displayed.

Mrs J just gets in, turns the key and drives. When I've tried to teach her about these things - I once tried to show her how to change a punctured wheel - she just replies "why keep a dog and bark yourself"? Always knew she had a pretty low opinion of me, Ha Ha!
 
With the audio stuff I just find the level of detail funny because while it's stuff I used to do when I had a stereo that was worth over a grand in parts...erm with a stock set up and maybe 20w RMS are you really going to notice it under-driving frequencies in the 50hz range and need to correct that with a 16 band EQ? Perhaps I'm just a philistine these days but as I say suspect it's for much more expensive cars with optional high end audio..and it's cheaper not to block it off.

But yeah, car people are a minority any of these observations in a social environment would hold the same level of interest as love island does for me...or the football for most. So the average person as long as it starts, stops goes and doesn't sound like it's about to explode then it's good to go.

I am eternally grateful for the French tradition of the "STOP!" Light which at least means the car sorts warnings into, "we're ok" "you need to think about stopping" and "what the bloody hell are you doing, are you trying to kill me?" So if it has an issue it will at least tell her clearly to pull over if it's needed which would include oil pressure.

Suppose new Astra's will have that given they are same engine!
 
A long time ago, a driving instructor friend called me with the following question.
"The oil light has just come on, how much oil do I need to add?"
My reply was, "Not really important, it'll need an engine."
Worrying the number of people who cannot understand the difference between oil pressure, and oil quantity.
(It was a Corsa, with the Fiat 1.3 diesel. Surprisingly, after adding oil, it continued, just slightly noisy, until the car was changed. We used to replace the cars every 7 months, so before any real issues surfaced. I imagine the next owner was disappointed.)

The warning lights are graded, like traffic lights. Red ones mean "panic now" (my interpretation), Yellow ones are "Important, do something soon" and green ones are "information".

Rear fog light warning is yellow, because they should only be used when visibility is below 100m. Front fog light warning is green, because they are effectively just dipped headlamps, and can be used any time.
 
A long time ago, a driving instructor friend called me with the following question.
"The oil light has just come on, how much oil do I need to add?"
My reply was, "Not really important, it'll need an engine."
Worrying the number of people who cannot understand teh difference between oil pressure, and oil quantity.

The warning lights are graded, like traffic lights. Red ones mean "panic now" (my interpretation), Yellow ones are "Important, do something soon" and green ones are "information".

Rear fog light warning is yellow, because they should only be used when visibility is below 100m. Front fog light warning is green, because they are effectively just dipped headlamps, and can be used any time.
It really is amazing how some people survive in life.
We had a petrol customer years ago whose car was smoking , oil was coming out every where, she had actually filled the engine oil to the top of the rocker box.
 
It really is amazing how some people survive in life.
We had a petrol customer years ago whose car was smoking , oil was coming out every where, she had actually filled the engine oil to the top of the rocker box.
I've heard of that one happening Mike, but never actually come across it myself. However I did once witness an interesting one. The chap working in the next bay to me suddenly let our a loud expletive - the second word of which was "me" and the first had 4 letters - and invited me to quickly come and look. The car was up on the ramp and the oil was draining it looked like magnolia paint! Anyway, investigations were carried out but there seemed nothing wrong with the engine so the customer was phoned and it transpired that just that morning he'd noticed the water level was low in the overflow tank so he'd filled it up. We never did understand why he thought the oil filler was where the coolant went but that was what he'd done, emptied about a litre or so of coolant into the oil filler" The boss decided we should pressure test the cooling system and if Ok, refill it with oil and a new filter and start it up and see how it ran. It ran very well with no funny noises and we think he'd only driven it from his house to the garage. Anyway, the service was completed and the man took the car away with the boss saying to bring it back in about a week and we'd change the oil again and give it a check over. The chap dropped in about a month later to tell the boss he'd part ex'd the car for a new (used) one and would we be able to look after it for him - different make to his old one. So we never really got to know if it survived or not.
 
My Dad would say of a chap he knew.. had a vague interest in vehicles as a teenager

In their late 20's my Dad got to hear of him again.. a Journalist in FleetStreet

In their 30's he was 'Chief Motoring Writer' for a Broadsheet paper

My Dads comment :
'I wouldnt trust him to fill my Radiator'

Plenty of them around :)
 
My above post has just reminded me of this. My younger boy came round with his family yesterday afternoon and we all went rollerskating at Ocean Terminal - well, the younger one's did, Mrs J and I shouted encouragement from the sidelines. He'd also come to show us the new car (Audi A4 Avant 1.4 TFSI) which he'd just collected that morning and I've talked about in another thread (can't remember which one though) So, when we'd returned home he wanted me to show him how to check the levels etc. Took about 10 minutes to figure out how to release the safety secondary bonnet catch, just me being "silly". Having opened the bonnet the coolant expansion tank was easy to see and registering half way between full and low so all good there (it'll have a sensor too I'm sure) But oil dip stick? after a thorough search there's no sign of one. Can't see the clutch or brake fluid reservoir caps either in fact didn't find the screenwash top up either! Then I suddenly seemed to remember reading somewhere that they don't have a dipstick but can display oil level on the infotainment screen. So into the car and there, beside the gear lever, on the between seats consul (which wouldn't look amiss in the Starship Enterprise) is a button marked menu and just under it a "volume" knob which wouldn't look out of place on my AV amp! So push the Menu button Jock. Yeah, the infotainment is now displaying a frightening multiple choice of stuff, one of which is "Car" Rotate the Volume knob to high light "Car" and push the middle of the knob to select. another menu pops up with one of the selections available being "Servicing and checks" or something like that. Twiddle the "volume" knob again to highlight and push to select. Now we see more choices one of which being "oil level", HURRAH! twiddle some more to highlight and select and a screen comes up with a message to the effect that oil level is OK with a wee level indicator on the right hand side similar to what the "business" end of a dipstick looks like. Strewth! I could have checked half a dozen "ordinary" dipsticks by now.

Having had time to calm down after last night I think this system is not all that inconvenient once you know how to do it but i don't like that it relies on sensors. You can't manually check it if you suspect a sensor is giving a wrong reading - or no reading at all. I'd much rather have a dipstick. Come to think of it this very engine does have one in other applications, like the Octavia for instance. Wonder if i can "retrofit" an Octavia dipstick to it? Oh, and we still haven't found any of the other stuff. Probably should read the owner's manual eh? Noticed it has a red plastic covered jump start connector too, so battery in the boot?
 
I had similar in my 'short lived' Skoda..

Mainly in there for the TPMS.. but didnt find it 'useful'

My friend with the Golf saga needed an Oil sensor.. as its new engine stopped registering Oil Temperature..

It was a 2 function sensor.. Pressure presumably the other

Again.. not sure thats 'Progress'
 
What I thought was a case of spring allergies/grandsons' shared cold morphed into a horrible sinus infection. Friday, I managed to teach a couple of safety classes and go roller skating in the evening. I wasn't 100% but I wasn't down for the count, either. Yesterday, Heysues Aitch Kryst, I couldn't swallow and could barely walk in a straight line. A fit of coughing would lay me out. Mrs.Cheest finally figured out I wasn't being a whiney SOB and took me to an immediate care facility.

I told the folks there, that in my 67 years, I've had about 60 of these and needed a round of antibiotics. I got checked over, tested for Covid and Strep, and in the end, "You have a sinus infection and it's a beaut."(no sh!t, Sherlock). I got my round of antibiotics AND a prescription strength nasal spray. Lemmee tell ya, Drain-o has nothing on that nasal spray. Two shots up each nostril and be ready to spit.

After some of the prescribed meds, I'm somewhat functional today. I managed to get down breakfast(important)and coffee(very important). Walking's not an issue, either. I can tolerate the minor cough and headache. I may actually be somewhat productive this afternoon.
 
Grand children are dangerous to your health. We've had doses of just about everything going since they went back to school and were all able to share and spread their diseases! Sorry to hear of your infection, Mrs J tends to be rather prone to them but i seem to get more eye and ear problems - where would we be without the antibiotics though? Glad to hear you seem to be on the mend.
 
Thanks, PAJ.

Grandson Owen seems to have a permanent green and crusty upper lip like his mom when she was little. The older grandson, Eli, was/is a drooler. I don't spend enough time with the granddaughters to get whatever they're willing to share.

Mrs.Cheest is suffering through with her version of what Owen shared with various teas and OTC stuff. She avoids prescription meds and doctors as much as possible. She had a traumatic experience with an army doctor as a kid and has little faith in doctors now.

I went on an extended walk with Buster dog this morning. It felt good to get out but this infection has wiped me out more than I thought. I might join Buster for an old guy's nap.
 
Interestingly - or not? - if you drive down the road, keep the throttle applied with your right foot and brake with your left, as soon as the brake pedal is depressed the throttle is cut. Wonder if they do that to save the DSG auto box versions from left foot brakers?
not something I can check on mine being the manual. Wife didn’t want an automatic claims she can’t drive them and I test drove the automatic and didn’t get on with it, very twitchy on the kick down (This is with the golf cab no idea how it responds on others)

What I thought was a case of spring allergies/grandsons' shared cold morphed into a horrible sinus infection. Friday, I managed to teach a couple of safety classes and go roller skating in the evening. I wasn't 100% but I wasn't down for the count, either. Yesterday, Heysues Aitch Kryst, I couldn't swallow and could barely walk in a straight line. A fit of coughing would lay me out. Mrs.Cheest finally figured out I wasn't being a whiney SOB and took me to an immediate care facility.
this is about the state I’m in currently, we were on holiday at a centre parcs week before last and assume I’ve picked up something from the human soup pot that is the pool. Spent most of yesterday in bed with sinuses trying to break my head open from the inside out. I have plenty of nasal sprays and Tablets but might need to call the dr tomorrow for some antibiotics
 
If you've got small kids in your life...there's only 2 states.

1. Coming down with something.
2. Got something but powering through..
Wife is a paediatrician therefore all the usual bugs that would kill normal parents, we get exposed to regularly obviously my immune system doesn’t get subjected to everything hers does but we’re normally fairly hardy.

May go some way to explaining why it’s not effected her like it has me.
 
My above post has just reminded me of this. My younger boy came round with his family yesterday afternoon and we all went rollerskating at Ocean Terminal - well, the younger one's did, Mrs J and I shouted encouragement from the sidelines. He'd also come to show us the new car (Audi A4 Avant 1.4 TFSI) which he'd just collected that morning and I've talked about in another thread (can't remember which one though) So, when we'd returned home he wanted me to show him how to check the levels etc. Took about 10 minutes to figure out how to release the safety secondary bonnet catch, just me being "silly". Having opened the bonnet the coolant expansion tank was easy to see and registering half way between full and low so all good there (it'll have a sensor too I'm sure) But oil dip stick? after a thorough search there's no sign of one. Can't see the clutch or brake fluid reservoir caps either in fact didn't find the screenwash top up either! Then I suddenly seemed to remember reading somewhere that they don't have a dipstick but can display oil level on the infotainment screen. So into the car and there, beside the gear lever, on the between seats consul (which wouldn't look amiss in the Starship Enterprise) is a button marked menu and just under it a "volume" knob which wouldn't look out of place on my AV amp! So push the Menu button Jock. Yeah, the infotainment is now displaying a frightening multiple choice of stuff, one of which is "Car" Rotate the Volume knob to high light "Car" and push the middle of the knob to select. another menu pops up with one of the selections available being "Servicing and checks" or something like that. Twiddle the "volume" knob again to highlight and push to select. Now we see more choices one of which being "oil level", HURRAH! twiddle some more to highlight and select and a screen comes up with a message to the effect that oil level is OK with a wee level indicator on the right hand side similar to what the "business" end of a dipstick looks like. Strewth! I could have checked half a dozen "ordinary" dipsticks by now.

Having had time to calm down after last night I think this system is not all that inconvenient once you know how to do it but i don't like that it relies on sensors. You can't manually check it if you suspect a sensor is giving a wrong reading - or no reading at all. I'd much rather have a dipstick. Come to think of it this very engine does have one in other applications, like the Octavia for instance. Wonder if i can "retrofit" an Octavia dipstick to it? Oh, and we still haven't found any of the other stuff. Probably should read the owner's manual eh? Noticed it has a red plastic covered jump start connector too, so battery in the boot?
As so few owners check levels, and then blame manufacturers if their car breaks, most manufacturers are fitting sensors to all the fluids. Once they were satisfied with the sensor reliability, they saved a few pennies on the dipsticks, as so few people will miss them.
Some models have a dipstick, usually with a black head, hidden under the plastic covers, but only used when servicing. Others, they just drain the old oil out, and refill with an accurately measured amount. (That's the theory anyway.)
At startup, there should pop up briefly an 'Oil OK' message on the display between the speedo and tacho, btu it only shows for a second or two.
 
Set off for the dentist this morning, just a couple of miles in, and the car squeaked, and displayed, "Check Engine", and the yellow engine light illuminated. Not enough time to return home for the Fabia.
Most common cause of the engine check light seems to be oxygen sensor. Still driveable, so it can do the 45 mile round trip. Engine not misfiring, seemed to be performing normally.
Got home, plugged the computer in, told 'after cat sensor lost earth connection'.
A physical check shows no issues. Cleared the code, will see what it does tomorrow morning. Might be a glitch, or might need a new sensor. Unusual for the post-cat one to go, as the pre-cat one does most work. This is the Doblo, 1.4 16v, 13,300 miles. (6 years of little use as a wheelchair vehicle, now suffering from the shock of being used normally. I've done 1300 miles since beginning of Jan, that's more than half a year's previous use.)

Edit: Further thoughts. The oxygen sensor has a heater, with a supply and earth, and a pair of sensing wires, which do not earth. The heater element is usually the first failure, meaning it takes longer to warm up, relying on the hot exhaust gases. The fault code, referring to an earth fault, points to the heating element circuit. Easy, if expensive fix.
 
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Interestingly - or not? - if you drive down the road, keep the throttle applied with your right foot and brake with your left, as soon as the brake pedal is depressed the throttle is cut. Wonder if they do that to save the DSG auto box versions from left foot brakers?


I think it likely that the "younger generation" will fine tune stuff like the audio but the majority won't. I'm always amazed at the number of people, who when you're talking to them, have very little or no idea what any of the dash warning displays mean. A very common one is the oil warning light (the little oil can sign) Many people I've talked to think it means they need to top up the oil level soon! Not that long ago I was out with my younger boy, in his Astra going 65/70 mph on the city bypass. Dad, says he, there's been a little light on the dashboard for a wee while now and it's not going out. It was the oil warning light! How long's it been lit I asked? Don't know, a few minutes anyway. I reasoned that if it really was lack of oil pressure we'd have been hearing the big ends making a bid for freedom by then and luckily we were just approaching a slip road, so I got him to come off the motorway and pull over. Oil level was fine as was water level and nothing was too hot. so we started her up again and drove gently to my house where i discovered it was a failed pressure switch, Phew! This experience quite surprised me because he's actually quite interested in his car - but not actually getting his hands dirty. My older boy I could understand as he has absolutely no interest in mechanical things whatsoever - plays the guitar beautifully though, can bring tears to my eyes! but I thought the younger one had more of a grip on things than he displayed.

Mrs J just gets in, turns the key and drives. When I've tried to teach her about these things - I once tried to show her how to change a punctured wheel - she just replies "why keep a dog and bark yourself"? Always knew she had a pretty low opinion of me, Ha Ha!
Panda is the same. Its to ensure you cannot dry your brakes.... which leads to brakes disc rust... which leads to faling MOTs and the need to buy another car after 12 months or so.... If you brake first , hold the brakes and reapply throttle you can resume command. I suppose in emergency it means if you hit both brake and accekerator pedals the brake pedal is king.
 
Wife is a paediatrician therefore all the usual bugs that would kill normal parents, we get exposed to regularly obviously my immune system doesn’t get subjected to everything hers does but we’re normally fairly hardy.

May go some way to explaining why it’s not effected her like it has me.
I used to call the children the vectors. Theres a third state.... Infected diseased and dying as result a exposure to disease vector..... again.
 
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