JonnyBoy said:Just don't do anything thats even vaguely maths/engineering/science related. Then you'll be fine
sorted
JonnyBoy said:A woman goes to see her local vicar. She says "My husband keeps falling asleep in your sermons."
The vicar replies "Poke him with this hat pin every time he falls asleep. I'll nod to you if I see him asleep."
Next day, the couple are in church, and sure enough the man falls asleep. The vicar nods to the woman as he delivers his sermon... "and who was the creator of the world?"...
The woman pokes the man, who wakes up with a shout of "God almighty!".
"Well done, Mr. Jones", says the vicar.
A while later he falls asleep again, and the vicar nods while saying...
"And who is our saviour?"...
The woman pokes her husband again.
"Jesus christ!", says the man as wakes up.
"Well done again, Mr. Jones", says the vicar.
The man soon falls asleep again and the vicar carries on talking... "And what did Eve say to Adam after they had had their 99th kid?"...
At that point the man wakes up and shouts "If you poke that f***ing thing in me one more time I'll break it in half and shove it up your arse!"
ROFFPMSL!!!!!!