Just look up the issues with these cars, I'm not talking about a defective radio or a loose screw here...
Apart from regular complaints from evoke owners that the fit of things isn't aways great, I'm not seeing a huge amount of problems that would concern me. The ML has been around 20 years so yeah there are bound to be models which have big problems getting on in years. The X3 is the same its been around a while to problems crop up. The evoke is still quite a new car the oldest ones being 4-5 years and there really are not the huge problems you're implying.
The 500x is a nice little car but it doesn't go to the same school as the big boys, they are not packed with the same level of technology and more to the point haven't even been around a year yet so you can't possibly comment on reliability, what the 500x does do is compete in a very full market sector, of Nissan, ford, Vauxhall, mini, Subaru, Mazda, all of which provide high levels of equipment and reliability, the only reason to pick the fiat in the market is brand loyalty and the looks of the car, and as already pointed out looks are very subjective.
I don't know where you get that the 500X shares anything with the EvoQUE, it only shares a lot with other Fiat models, and with it's brother the Jeep Renegade, so as long as you don't get the 9-speed auto, you're better off than with the obnoxiously flashy expensive brag-mobiles.
fiat bought the 9 speed auto and fitted to the 4x4 models.... It's the same gear box as is in the evoke. So what you're saying your ok with the 500x as long as you don't buy the 4x4 model and you stick to the cheap low equipment cars, taking your comparison to the top end luxury small suv even further away. Why bother at all with the 500x in that case and not just buy a Dacia...... In fact why didn't you buy the Dacia ? Because you wanted something a bit more flash.
And as I said before, who buys a Porsche... There are a lot of people out there who buy a car for the badge. The Porsche SUV is an excellent car for a guy with more money than taste going trough his mid life crisis, desperately wanting that bragbadge but also needs a car that fits his kids, dog, golfbag and he can get in and out of without needing assistance, all while still being cheaper than a proper SUV + proper sportscar.
I love the term "more money than sense" it's often used by people who don't understand finances. Simply put if you £100,000 a year coming in and after paying all your bills and expenses put some in savings etc, and you still have £3000 a month unspent, do you sit on it? Let it pile up even more along side your savings? Or do you treat yourself to something you want? Something with a bit of luxury and prestige badge on the bonnet ? I'd never begrudge anyone having something expensive and flashy they have worked hard for, to do so seems jealous and bitter to me, it says more about you than the person in the Porsche or Range Rover or Ferrari.
By the way, the Range Rover at the Louvres is a proper Range Rover, the one that brings excellent off-road capabilities, practicality and luxury in an understated stylish package and is actually worth its money... Not some cheaply made basic 13 in a dozen SUV designed by a teenager like the EvoQUe.
The Range Rover in the louvre was the original beam axel, no roll bars model with a v8 petrol and luxury including power steering a velour seats, a modern day panda 4x4 would leave it behind in an off road event and has 10 times the luxury. Since then the world moved on. And all Range Rover models design even now harks back to the styling of the original.
If I won the lottery would I go out and buy any of the cars? No but I would go and drive them all and see what I liked, because unless you're in a position to actually go and do that you're not in any position to criticise any of them, based on anything other that your dislike for something big and flashy, forgetting that big and flashing can also mean a damn good car.