A swift boot in the nuts might have made him see sense. 
General Silly stories
- Thread starter FuzzyPanda
- Start date
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General Silly stories
Do people from Larne have those?
I think with all the in-breeding they got left out......
:yuck:
Jim
I think with all the in-breeding they got left out......
:yuck:
Jim
e505jpy said:
I think the only thing they have in Larne is scabies!
I don't think they can afford those......
by the time they've used up all there dole on buckfast, rollies and brasso theres not much left over for std's
Jim
by the time they've used up all there dole on buckfast, rollies and brasso theres not much left over for std's
Jim
Did I tell you I was from Larne?
John H
Established member
Not so much silly, as a variant of the "gaps in traffic" theme:
in busy Birmingham traffic I spot a police dog van with "blues and twos" charging up behind me, so I make an effort and get well out of his way and get acknowledgement as he passes.
Half a mile ahead is one of the many junctions where the traffic snarls up, and I take my usual early right and a few back roads to miss the jam there.
A couple of minutes later I spot a police dog van with "blues and twos" charging up behind and repeat the "getting well out of the way" routine, but I get a funny look from the driver - it's the same van, presumably still on the same shout.
in busy Birmingham traffic I spot a police dog van with "blues and twos" charging up behind me, so I make an effort and get well out of his way and get acknowledgement as he passes.
Half a mile ahead is one of the many junctions where the traffic snarls up, and I take my usual early right and a few back roads to miss the jam there.
A couple of minutes later I spot a police dog van with "blues and twos" charging up behind and repeat the "getting well out of the way" routine, but I get a funny look from the driver - it's the same van, presumably still on the same shout.
Ha ha, that's great! He must have been very confused!
OP
OP
Not a story as such, as no events actually happened, but certainly silly.
Today I went to Chester to get a watch (college leavers ball tonight, rock on) and parked in Bath Street (for those who know). Very tight space, but I got the bugger in no problem. Went about my business, and looked down the street as I was coming back and couldn't see my car anywhere. Uh oh. Thought it had either been towed away for exceeding the stay time, or maybe even stolen.
I kept walking down the street and spotted the Panda tucked behind an old Land Rover Defender, very well hidden! I was so relieved!
On the way home we had some fun, too, overtook about 15 cars in a queue for a roundabout, then dived into the right lane at the last second. Very cheeky, but saved me a lot of time.
Today I went to Chester to get a watch (college leavers ball tonight, rock on) and parked in Bath Street (for those who know). Very tight space, but I got the bugger in no problem. Went about my business, and looked down the street as I was coming back and couldn't see my car anywhere. Uh oh. Thought it had either been towed away for exceeding the stay time, or maybe even stolen.
I kept walking down the street and spotted the Panda tucked behind an old Land Rover Defender, very well hidden! I was so relieved!
On the way home we had some fun, too, overtook about 15 cars in a queue for a roundabout, then dived into the right lane at the last second. Very cheeky, but saved me a lot of time.
FuzzyPanda said:looked down the street as I was coming back and couldn't see my car anywhere. Uh oh. Thought it had either been towed away for exceeding the stay time, or maybe even stolen.
I kept walking down the street and spotted the Panda tucked behind an old Land Rover Defender, very well hidden! I was so relieved!
On a similar theme, I always reverse into a parking space on a car-park, and I tend to go back as far as possible so that the rear bumper is only about an inch or two from the wall behind me. First few times on supermarket car-parks it bothered me that I couldn't see my car, but I've now taken to looking down the line for where the gap appears to be because I know that's where I'm parked!
OP
OP
It also annoys the hell out of people looking for a space!
"Ooh a space"
*Starts to turn in"
"Err... who put that there."
"Ooh a space"
*Starts to turn in"
"Err... who put that there."
Don't you find it hard to put your shopping in the boot then?
Fair point, but I rarely do a 'big shop'The Negotiator said:
More often than not I just pop in for a few items that go on the passenger seat. Anyway, when it's 'empty' it's nearly full, what with the tools and stuff I carry around.
Steve has a silly story involving traffic lights and a BMW cabriolet.....
....But I'll let him tell it!
Jim
....But I'll let him tell it!
Jim
Oh yeah, well he looked like a stuck up old bugger and I was just amusing myself. I was sitting beside him looking in and revving my mighty engine. He gave me such a scornful look I swear he must have been practising. I'd have had him if he wanted to race though. Honestly...
OP
OP
Haha, great stuff.
Today Rufus took three people to a meal, with Gay Bar by Electric Six on kinda loud. As you do.
Today Rufus took three people to a meal, with Gay Bar by Electric Six on kinda loud. As you do.
Rufus!?
...Some of us can't play music like that cause it's to much of a cliche!
Anyway, I'll take it that he's Rufus cause he's Roof-less?
Jim
Anyway, I'll take it that he's Rufus cause he's Roof-less?
Jim
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OP
OP
Jim's got it spot on.
My brother's car is called Rolf.
Guess the car.
My brother's car is called Rolf.
Guess the car.
Rolf the Golf?
Another silly story which Jim has just reminded me about. Driving through Ballynahinch (a busy small town) on Saturday morning I had both windows down and the A-Team theme tune playing at full blast on the stereo. I got a few funny looks. Even my 9 year old son was embarrassed.
