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Ozric_Al
Guest
Boss is on holiday for a couple of weeks and his company car is nearing the mileage for replacement. So I have his 2005 Type R for 2 weeks and thought I'd share my thoughts on it.
First of all, let's get it out of the way, it's ugly, sinfully UGLY! But you knew that didn't you? However, that ugliness allows for ample rear seating for 6-footers and a very generous bootspace. All very reassuring but for the fact it's a flaming hot-hatch so who gives a monkeys if people in the back can sit straight and get their shopping in the back? Not me, it's UGLY and it's far too long for a 3-door hot hatch. It really doesn't pass the "Checking yourself out in the shop window" test.
Second, let's get this out of the way too - it's fast, DAMN FAST, and if I have this thing much longer I fear for my licence. The problem with is that I just can't seem to drive it sedately. It's not because it sounds great when you rev it (it doesn't, it sounds like a bag full of spanners having a rather heated argument with a schizophrenic box of frogs) or that you want to drive fast (I don't, that's why i have an HGT that behaves itself below 4,000 rpm), it's just that it goes from 0-lunacy in 0.0001 seconds. The engine is noisy and rough and is an affront to the ears. For some reason it sounds like your doing 7,000 rpm when in reality, you're only doing 3,000. This I do not like. However, the second kick of power at about 6,000 rpm is quite fun.
Thirdly, the handling is incredible. Who needs brakes when a car can handle corners like this? However, there is a HUGE compromise to be made in the ride quality department. It's VERY harsh and that's coming from an HGT driver! Fast, secure handling and noisy. I think that would be a fair appraisal.
However, it would not be a complete appraisal. There are other things that I must address: -
1) Did Stevie Wonder design the interior? The scariest thing about this car is driving it with your eyes closed because they are bleeding from the pain of having to look at the train wreck that is the dash. It's a total mess, completely devoid of any flowing lines or aesthetically pleasing features. It looks like they glued bits on as they remembered they needed them. From the oddly cream coloured dials to the irritating dash mouted gearstick and that awful silver painted centre console it's wrong, so very wrong. I've even noticed that the plastic of the door cards is a different shade to the dash into which they are (supposedly) sculpted. Very poor.
2) The seats. Hmmmmm, how do I describe the seats? Well........last time I was in Thailand we had a family day out. The girlfriends brother took us all out in his Nissan Pick-Up truck meaning that I spent 4 hours sat on a plank of wood with nothing but a hand towel separating my poor buttocks from the wrath of the splintered 2 by 4. How I long for that plank and hand towel after 5 minutes of sitting in this car. The Spanish Inquisition were the last ones to use seats this uncomfortable!!!
3) Build quality - "hold on Oz, it's a Honda and you drive a FIAT. You can't POSSIBLY have a gripe about build quality, surely." Well, both the handles used to lift the seats forward are broken so it's rather difficult to get that 6-footer in the back. The electric windows stick and are slow and the switches make the ones in the Bravo feel Germanic - old school Germanic at that. Also, there are more rattles in this thing than my local branch of Mothercare. What's that all about? Granted this one has done 60K but my HGT feels more together and it's 6 years older.
So in summary, I guess I don't like this car much but then I'm no boy-racer. I want a car that is sedate when I want it to be but has the poke for some fun if I want it. This thing is just madness. It's noisy, uncomfortable and difficult to drive with your eyes closed. The idea of having it was to save me some money (company car so I don't have to pay for the fuel) but I find myself taking Shabash! out so that I can enjoy driving again.
Britvic Type A(R)se? not for me thanks. Good God I'm getting old!!
First of all, let's get it out of the way, it's ugly, sinfully UGLY! But you knew that didn't you? However, that ugliness allows for ample rear seating for 6-footers and a very generous bootspace. All very reassuring but for the fact it's a flaming hot-hatch so who gives a monkeys if people in the back can sit straight and get their shopping in the back? Not me, it's UGLY and it's far too long for a 3-door hot hatch. It really doesn't pass the "Checking yourself out in the shop window" test.
Second, let's get this out of the way too - it's fast, DAMN FAST, and if I have this thing much longer I fear for my licence. The problem with is that I just can't seem to drive it sedately. It's not because it sounds great when you rev it (it doesn't, it sounds like a bag full of spanners having a rather heated argument with a schizophrenic box of frogs) or that you want to drive fast (I don't, that's why i have an HGT that behaves itself below 4,000 rpm), it's just that it goes from 0-lunacy in 0.0001 seconds. The engine is noisy and rough and is an affront to the ears. For some reason it sounds like your doing 7,000 rpm when in reality, you're only doing 3,000. This I do not like. However, the second kick of power at about 6,000 rpm is quite fun.
Thirdly, the handling is incredible. Who needs brakes when a car can handle corners like this? However, there is a HUGE compromise to be made in the ride quality department. It's VERY harsh and that's coming from an HGT driver! Fast, secure handling and noisy. I think that would be a fair appraisal.
However, it would not be a complete appraisal. There are other things that I must address: -
1) Did Stevie Wonder design the interior? The scariest thing about this car is driving it with your eyes closed because they are bleeding from the pain of having to look at the train wreck that is the dash. It's a total mess, completely devoid of any flowing lines or aesthetically pleasing features. It looks like they glued bits on as they remembered they needed them. From the oddly cream coloured dials to the irritating dash mouted gearstick and that awful silver painted centre console it's wrong, so very wrong. I've even noticed that the plastic of the door cards is a different shade to the dash into which they are (supposedly) sculpted. Very poor.
2) The seats. Hmmmmm, how do I describe the seats? Well........last time I was in Thailand we had a family day out. The girlfriends brother took us all out in his Nissan Pick-Up truck meaning that I spent 4 hours sat on a plank of wood with nothing but a hand towel separating my poor buttocks from the wrath of the splintered 2 by 4. How I long for that plank and hand towel after 5 minutes of sitting in this car. The Spanish Inquisition were the last ones to use seats this uncomfortable!!!
3) Build quality - "hold on Oz, it's a Honda and you drive a FIAT. You can't POSSIBLY have a gripe about build quality, surely." Well, both the handles used to lift the seats forward are broken so it's rather difficult to get that 6-footer in the back. The electric windows stick and are slow and the switches make the ones in the Bravo feel Germanic - old school Germanic at that. Also, there are more rattles in this thing than my local branch of Mothercare. What's that all about? Granted this one has done 60K but my HGT feels more together and it's 6 years older.
So in summary, I guess I don't like this car much but then I'm no boy-racer. I want a car that is sedate when I want it to be but has the poke for some fun if I want it. This thing is just madness. It's noisy, uncomfortable and difficult to drive with your eyes closed. The idea of having it was to save me some money (company car so I don't have to pay for the fuel) but I find myself taking Shabash! out so that I can enjoy driving again.
Britvic Type A(R)se? not for me thanks. Good God I'm getting old!!
