Technical Bonnet stuck

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Technical Bonnet stuck

Joined
Mar 1, 2004
Messages
3,706
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Location
Birmingham, United Kingdo
The wife's bonnett is stuck shut. When I pull the internal lever theres no resistance. The cable hasn't broke but seized I think. How easy/hard is it to get at from underneath. Don't want her messing up her hair when she does it.
 
Absolute p..s easy job to open the bonnet from under car.

First lay wife at front of car with arm outstretched.

Issue wife with safety spectacles for eye protection.

Drive over arm repeatedly with car, the aim is to dislocate as many joints as possible without breaking the arm too much.

Reverse back over wife, (move arm first, you dont want to overdo it do you?)

Fit on wifes hat, (or be prepared to pay for possible expensive hairdo).

Slide wifes head and limp arm under front of car.

Push car back after it rolls forward over wife and apply handbrake.

Inspect front of car for damage.

Help wife raise modified arm into position behind radiator.

Instruct wife (using porters manual) on how to remove bonnet lock mechanism.

Push car back after it rolls forward again over wife and reapply handbrake.

Make note, Must get wife to check handbrake operation when shes finished fixing bonnet.

Encourage wife and lift bonnet when signalled by wife that job is complete.

Check all levels (ALL OK) and slam bonnet.

Ask wife why she left her hand on bonnet shut panel.

Open bonnet with wifes help again.

Remove wifes hand and remove wife from under car.

Read notes

Ask wife if she is going to check the handbrake now?

Ask wife to call for ambulance as she appears to have fallen over with her arm outstretched and her fist made contact with your chin and you fell over.

Get in Ambulance.

With Wife.

Watch car roll down the drive and hit neighbours car because she didnt bother checking the handbrake like you asked.
 
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