Gli Azzurri
New member
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2014
- Messages
- 8
- Points
- 2
Hey all, thanks for taking the time to read this.
I probably shouldn't base an important life decision on what somebody else advises, but hey, it would be nice to have the opinion of somebody TOTALLY independent of me and indeed my ex.
Basically, got together with a girl last January, to be honest i'm only 22 now and she was my first proper relationship. The first few months were magic, and we were both really happy. She'd told me about her upbringing, i won't go into too much detail but it was grim, she's been abused in every different way and her mother died in her infancy, leaving her with only a deadbeat father. All of that never seemed to bother her though, she was always upbeat and that helped me. I'm a long sufferer of clinical depression and she was working wonders for me.
But 6 months in, cracks started to show. At this point we were spending ALL DAY every day together, she couldn't find work and i was a lazy student who never really did any work. We began to argue a lot, mostly about her lack of trust for me. She'd always accuse me of being up to no good, and although she didn't explicitly make me stop talking to other girls (previous friends), i did in order to keep the peace.
Then, whenever we'd go out, she'd accuse me of staring at another girl or chatting up a barmaid (apparently ordering a drink is chatting up). So then after that we couldn't go out any more, even though at the start of the relationship we'd socialise all the time.
Then, when we were watching television, she'd fly off the handle if i stared at a girl for too long, so i had to start being careful about where my eyes were focused ALL the time, i felt trapped, she had a hold on me that i couldn't shake. Ok maybe i let her do all this to me, but i just wanted a quiet life!.
Plus, she'd call me a pervert, all the time. Sometime for no reason, we'd just be going along in the car and she'd say 'Pervert'. To be honest it was driving me insane.
It was at this point i was having thoughts about packing it in, i was 22 years old and wasn't allowed to go out to pubs or have any female friends.
It all came to head about 5 weeks ago, if you couldn't have guessed, the girl had a temper problem (inherited from her c*** of a a father). Rather than ask me nicely to wash up (i woulda done it no problem), she said "F****** do the washing up". I just laughed and went to walk the dog. As i was walking off, she started knocking **** outta the wall in our flat, even managed to crack breeze block. Easily a couple of hundred quids worth of damage.
I'd stayed with her for this long because i thought i could help her, help her control her anger and learn to trust men (she seemed to have a hatred for blokes in general). But as soon as she starts destroying my wall, she was out on her arse.
The other reason i stayed with her was because all this nastiness aside, she's a fantastic girl. She's the only girl who's ever looked passed my physical flaws and given me a chance, she was wonderfully affectionate, and was just so damn cute. Plus, looks wise, she's way outta my league. (Although her self esteem was at rock bottom).
I even got engaged to her! in an effort show my commitment and stop her fretting about me doing a runner, but that didn't bloody work.
Now it's been about 5 weeks, she's technically homeless and living with her sister or something. I do miss her, it's hard sometimes. I wonder if i'm ever gonna find a girl with all the positive sides of her again. I know she misses me a **** load too, maybe know she knows i have it in me to bin her, she'll behave herself a bit better?
All just a bloody mess!
My mates say i defo shouldn't get back with her, because they've seen some of the **** she's put me through, but they haven't seen her other side, the other side i fell in love with.
Bloody women :bang:
I probably shouldn't base an important life decision on what somebody else advises, but hey, it would be nice to have the opinion of somebody TOTALLY independent of me and indeed my ex.
Basically, got together with a girl last January, to be honest i'm only 22 now and she was my first proper relationship. The first few months were magic, and we were both really happy. She'd told me about her upbringing, i won't go into too much detail but it was grim, she's been abused in every different way and her mother died in her infancy, leaving her with only a deadbeat father. All of that never seemed to bother her though, she was always upbeat and that helped me. I'm a long sufferer of clinical depression and she was working wonders for me.
But 6 months in, cracks started to show. At this point we were spending ALL DAY every day together, she couldn't find work and i was a lazy student who never really did any work. We began to argue a lot, mostly about her lack of trust for me. She'd always accuse me of being up to no good, and although she didn't explicitly make me stop talking to other girls (previous friends), i did in order to keep the peace.
Then, whenever we'd go out, she'd accuse me of staring at another girl or chatting up a barmaid (apparently ordering a drink is chatting up). So then after that we couldn't go out any more, even though at the start of the relationship we'd socialise all the time.
Then, when we were watching television, she'd fly off the handle if i stared at a girl for too long, so i had to start being careful about where my eyes were focused ALL the time, i felt trapped, she had a hold on me that i couldn't shake. Ok maybe i let her do all this to me, but i just wanted a quiet life!.
Plus, she'd call me a pervert, all the time. Sometime for no reason, we'd just be going along in the car and she'd say 'Pervert'. To be honest it was driving me insane.
It was at this point i was having thoughts about packing it in, i was 22 years old and wasn't allowed to go out to pubs or have any female friends.
It all came to head about 5 weeks ago, if you couldn't have guessed, the girl had a temper problem (inherited from her c*** of a a father). Rather than ask me nicely to wash up (i woulda done it no problem), she said "F****** do the washing up". I just laughed and went to walk the dog. As i was walking off, she started knocking **** outta the wall in our flat, even managed to crack breeze block. Easily a couple of hundred quids worth of damage.
I'd stayed with her for this long because i thought i could help her, help her control her anger and learn to trust men (she seemed to have a hatred for blokes in general). But as soon as she starts destroying my wall, she was out on her arse.
The other reason i stayed with her was because all this nastiness aside, she's a fantastic girl. She's the only girl who's ever looked passed my physical flaws and given me a chance, she was wonderfully affectionate, and was just so damn cute. Plus, looks wise, she's way outta my league. (Although her self esteem was at rock bottom).
I even got engaged to her! in an effort show my commitment and stop her fretting about me doing a runner, but that didn't bloody work.
Now it's been about 5 weeks, she's technically homeless and living with her sister or something. I do miss her, it's hard sometimes. I wonder if i'm ever gonna find a girl with all the positive sides of her again. I know she misses me a **** load too, maybe know she knows i have it in me to bin her, she'll behave herself a bit better?
All just a bloody mess!
My mates say i defo shouldn't get back with her, because they've seen some of the **** she's put me through, but they haven't seen her other side, the other side i fell in love with.
Bloody women :bang: