Sorry guys...had to be done 
A major earthquake measuring 7.8 on the Richter scale hit Aberdeen in the
>>early hours of Monday.
>>
>>Epicentre: Torry, Aberdeen.
>>
>>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "fit i fu#k wiz
>>at'min" and "did yi fu'kin feel at'min". The earthquake decimated the area
>>causing approximately £30 worth of damage.
>>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and Spanish
>>Costa's were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out cars
>>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giro arrived.
>>Grampian News reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
>>bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something
>>interesting had happened in the area.
>>
>>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 8 said "It wiz
>>such a fu#kin shock min, ma little Chardonnay Mercedes come running into ma
>>bedroom greetin. Ma youngest two: Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through
>>it a min. I wiz still shakin when I wiz watching Kilroy the next morning
>>min."
>>
>>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as normal.
>>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large
>>quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books, jewellery
>>from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundstrecher.
>>
>>HOW CAN YOU HELP? This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing,
>>parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster.
>>Clothing is most sought after, the most needed include:
>>Fila or Burberry baseball caps, Kappa tracksuit tops (his and
>>hers),Hillfiger Shell suits (female), white sport socks, kickers boots and
>>any other items usually sold in Primark. Food parcels may be harder to come
>>by, but are needed all the same. Required foodstuffs include Microwave
>>meals, tins of baked beans,Pot noodles and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms, £2.00 buys chips,
>>crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9, £15.00 will pay for a packet
>>of B&H and a bag of smack to calm the nerves of those affected.
>>
>>Please do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housing is unfair
>>on the population of Woodside, Logie, Northfield,Seaton,Froghall,Kincorth
>>and Tillydrone.
A major earthquake measuring 7.8 on the Richter scale hit Aberdeen in the
>>early hours of Monday.
>>
>>Epicentre: Torry, Aberdeen.
>>
>>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "fit i fu#k wiz
>>at'min" and "did yi fu'kin feel at'min". The earthquake decimated the area
>>causing approximately £30 worth of damage.
>>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and Spanish
>>Costa's were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out cars
>>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giro arrived.
>>Grampian News reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
>>bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something
>>interesting had happened in the area.
>>
>>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 8 said "It wiz
>>such a fu#kin shock min, ma little Chardonnay Mercedes come running into ma
>>bedroom greetin. Ma youngest two: Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through
>>it a min. I wiz still shakin when I wiz watching Kilroy the next morning
>>min."
>>
>>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as normal.
>>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large
>>quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books, jewellery
>>from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundstrecher.
>>
>>HOW CAN YOU HELP? This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing,
>>parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster.
>>Clothing is most sought after, the most needed include:
>>Fila or Burberry baseball caps, Kappa tracksuit tops (his and
>>hers),Hillfiger Shell suits (female), white sport socks, kickers boots and
>>any other items usually sold in Primark. Food parcels may be harder to come
>>by, but are needed all the same. Required foodstuffs include Microwave
>>meals, tins of baked beans,Pot noodles and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms, £2.00 buys chips,
>>crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9, £15.00 will pay for a packet
>>of B&H and a bag of smack to calm the nerves of those affected.
>>
>>Please do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housing is unfair
>>on the population of Woodside, Logie, Northfield,Seaton,Froghall,Kincorth
>>and Tillydrone.
