How many kids?

[ChrisUK]

ROFL PMSL that sums it up in a little picture . I'll have to print a load of them out and stick them on and near the job centre lol....:devil:

 

[Ulpian]

Simple:

Only child benefit - good child benefit - for the first two children, and only then if you are married, I mean with a proper marriage certificate. Get divorced and lose the benefit. Your choice. The benefit only goes to decent, responsible people who marry sensibly and work at their marriages. The death of a spouse would of course allow the child benefit to continue. Marriage is better for the kids. You divorce, you hurt your kids - your decision - your responsibility. Oooooooohhhhh, responsibility; a difficult word that for some people.

Whoever said that those left working and paying tax are going to be fleeced by the current system is not entirely right - we're going to get the hell out of here and let the scroungers have the place to themselves.

 

[Hellcat]

A limit? Sounds good. How is it implemented in China? :chin:

The mentality of someone who would bring a child into the world without the financial means to support them should be investigated. I really really want a cat, but wouldn't get one until I'm sure I could afford it. I earn (and this isn't intended as bragging) a fair amount more than the average worker. Bunny is a high grade nurse, so she's earning a fair amount too. Even with our combined earnings I can't see us getting a cat this year - why someone would be so blaze about having children while unemployed is beyond me. I'd be s****** myself over how I would afford to keep the child..


edit: Maybe all us workers should strike for a week - all head down to London and demand change. Remind the Government that just because the only people marching on Downingstreet are students, the unemployed and the retired - they should not be the only ones being considered in policies.

 

[jug]

A limit? Sounds good. How is it implemented in China? :chin:

my chinese step mother is having a problem because she had a child in her first marriage, and the father took custody after the divorce (father always does in china) and now she isnt allowed to see the child AND she isnt allowed to have another if she lives in china even though she has married my dad.

i asked her what would happen if she got pregnant again, she said "very bad things i dont want to tell you". havent got a clue what that meant, but it sounds bad. she said she wouldnt be able to stay in china if she got pregnant, and she'd only be able to go back after giving birth.

it may seem harsh, but it will save china, they were quickly heading for disaster and this tough 1 child policy has really changed things for the better over there. my step mother really wants a child, yet she still thinks the 1 child policy is a good thing.

if they can do it, surely we could too. i think a limit based on income would be sensible. if you can afford it by all means have 3, if you cant afford it you shouldnt be allowed.

 

[dave]

Marriage is better for the kids. You divorce, you hurt your kids - your decision - your responsibility. Oooooooohhhhh, responsibility; a difficult word that for some people.

ah yeah much better to grow up in a house with 2 parents that don't get on and are constantly arguing

you can be good parents weather you are married or not

 

[angel]

ah yeah much better to grow up in a house with 2 parents that don't get on and are constantly arguing

you can be good parents weather you are married or not

Totally agree dave, its not fair, in my opinion, for a child to grow up in an house with the two people they love arguing.

For me it was the hardest decision i've had to make in life, but I know i've done the best thing. Its been a hard year or so, but much better now than it was prior to divorce.

A few of my friends on here have all seen it from my daughters perspective, i.e. being the child in a broken home, talking through things with them has helped me to see it from my daughters point of view too.

Its not just my life, its hers too.

 

[chaos]

Only child benefit - good child benefit - for the first two children, and only then if you are married, I mean with a proper marriage certificate. Get divorced and lose the benefit. Your choice. The benefit only goes to decent, responsible people who marry sensibly and work at their marriages.

Sometimes marriage break ups happen. It's natural. Sometimes you have to say enough - it's not gonna work out.
And plenty of people have had their parents divorce - just because they (the parents) don't love each other any more, doesn't mean that they love their kids any less. And just because someone is divorced doesn't necessarily mean that they aren't decent and responsible.

 

[sammiboo]

Simple:

Only child benefit - good child benefit - for the first two children, and only then if you are married, I mean with a proper marriage certificate. Get divorced and lose the benefit. Your choice. The benefit only goes to decent, responsible people who marry sensibly and work at their marriages. The death of a spouse would of course allow the child benefit to continue. Marriage is better for the kids. You divorce, you hurt your kids - your decision - your responsibility. Oooooooohhhhh, responsibility; a difficult word that for some people.

What about those poor husbands and wifes whose other half is a cheat? Sleeps around with different people. Its not fair they shoudl suffer becuase their other half cant be loyal! So its not as simple as you make out.

 

[angel]

Also, what about violent partners? Both men and women are regularly beat up and/or verbally abused in their homes.

What should they do, stay and put up with it or get out and get a life?

 

[sportingsmissus]

not getting into how wrong some of the comments in this thread are but i must be confused.....how much does it cost to have a child?

if i have £45000 in a savings account can i afford a child???
where is the actual price?

i'm not a parent but i do intend to have children....how much money should i have before we decide to have children??

i'm sure many parents will agree you can never put a price on having a child?

some people do scrounge fair enough but why punish other parents who want a big family or mums who want to stay at home to look after their own child.

i know for sure if i was ever put in a situation where any partner i was to have was violent or abusive, i wouldn't be sticking around no matter how some people would label me!!

would rather take my chances claiming benefits rather than been used as a punchbag etc. at least that way id have a chance to survive.

 

[Chas Uno]

Simple:

Only child benefit - good child benefit - for the first two children

That would work, but what about those who CAN support a larger family? Should they not get any extra child benefit?

and only then if you are married, I mean with a proper marriage certificate. Get divorced and lose the benefit. Your choice. The benefit only goes to decent, responsible people who marry sensibly and work at their marriages.

I can't see that working with 1 in 3 marriages ending in divorce (and rising). Plus many couples don't bother getting married now but still have kids and raise them responsibly. Marriage is, after all, just a legally binding document not a true indication of whether someone is decent or responsible.

Whoever said that those left working and paying tax are going to be fleeced by the current system is not entirely right - we're going to get the hell out of here and let the scroungers have the place to themselves.

I stated that! Unfortunately not everyone disgruntled with the welfare system will be able to get the hell out of the country for many reasons. Namely that most other decent countries have incredibly strict immigration laws now and unless you are suitably qualified you won't get a work visa.

However, those that can most probably will! Also worth bearing in mind that the UK does still have one of the most generous welfare systems in the world. Other first world countries seem attractive but unless you can fully support yourself and afford good healthcare insurance you are in a very big hole. Denmark has an extremely good system but their tax rates are incredibly high to pay for it.

As for me, needless to say that when I qualify at University I WILL be looking at moving abroad to a country that is very attractive but unless you can afford to support yourself you are on your own. It's a chance I want to take, and for all its faults its a country that offers a lot for those that are prepared to work for it.

Plus the weather is warmer where I want to go

 

[angel]

There is no price you can put on having a child, no matter how much you save up.

But having a child can be as expensive or as cheap as you want/need it to be. You can go out and spend hundreds on a top of the range pram etc or you can buy good quality second hand items, which is benefiting you and other other parents.

Its all down to you.

We just had a car boot at the weekend and sold yet more of my daughters grown out of clothes and toys/books etc, keep them clean and tidy and you'll make some money back on them, it also gives your child a way of valuing money.

My daughter desperately wants a Nintendo DS for christmas, she has been saving up all the money she gets from my parents, which is usually a couple of quid a week/fortnight and she got all her stuff ready for car boot and sold most of it, which she has given to me to put towards a DS because she knows mummy cant afford it.

Little does my daughter know, mummy has just been and bought it for her, so I cant wait to see her face on Christmas morning. Makes everything worthwhile scrimping and saving for.

 

[dave]

if i have £45000 in a savings account can i afford a child???
where is the actual price?

from birth to 18 £150,000. then they supposed to pay there own way, but daryl dont

 

[angel]

My brother still lived at home when he was about 30 and didnt pay my parents hardly anything.

Now he knows the value of money as he has a nice little rented bedsit.

Oh and it must be more than that dave, cos i'm sure i still cost my parents at the age of 38 lol

 

[sportingsmissus]

so then theres no limit? so how do you know you can ever afford a child? you can prepare and think you can afford a child but its totally up to you. thats what i thought, so then how would you decide who gets what under a different system.

 

[hmallett]

if i have £45000 in a savings account can i afford a child???
where is the actual price?

Stuart might sell you one of his for that! Though maybe he'd offer you a discount for the two of them

I have friends who have no savings who have children, and they manage OK.

H

 

[Stu DemonD]

We don't have savings, just debt lol.

 

[dave]

so then theres no limit? so how do you know you can ever afford a child?

well if you save all of mine n gazs toys that you pinch for your kids, that will say you having to buy them any

 

[Ulpian]

Actually, in terms of child development, rowing parents harm children far less than divorcing ones; provided we're not actually talking real violence here.
Kids can cope well with death too, far better than divorce. So killing the spouse might be kinder to the child than divorce as well.

As for cheating and adultery; just put up with it. Married people have historically had lovers and the traditional way was always to keep up appearances and do the shennanigans discretely on the side. Under no circumstances embarrass the other spouse publicly, or inded privately. We wouldn't inhibit our best friends' intimate relationships, so why our spouses once the initial passion has evaporated? My father had a mistress for years and my mother cared not one jot, it kept him out of the house and they were able to function perfectly well socially. I wouldn't dream of expecting monogomy, just decent manners. Never confuse love with marriage; it is and always has been a contract, a business contract in fact, intended to provide for the supppport of children. In the past love almost never came into it. If you are unhappy in a marriage; live with it. Or get divorced and pay the price, don't expect me to subsidise your emotional immaturity. That's all.

 

[chaos]

If you are unhappy in a marriage; live with it.

Are you married?