bodge jobs-daring repairs-pls tell us ur stories

Currently reading:
bodge jobs-daring repairs-pls tell us ur stories

Joined
Aug 25, 2009
Messages
64
Points
19
Location
colchester
well this is a thread to tell everyone how not to do a repair, share experiences and have a chuckle at others

first car pug 306 fairly unremarkeble

2nd car fiat bravo 1.8 HLX unfortunate

great car until a 19 year old paratrooper got ahold of it.
bought it for 600 quid
had it for 6 months and got into modding. joined bravo owners club and thought hmmm meshing your grill looks quite simple lets go at it
got the angle grinder out and went beserk. ended up cutting a whole in the bonnet too big for the scoop i did buy, bought some cheap mesh from halfauds and some body filler. eventually i was cutting up the metal sheet cover from microwaves to make a frame to tidy up the meshing attemp. couldnt find any blue heraldic paint to thought id paint the bumper carbon grey
and the bonnet after the mickey mouse scoop was glued in and fillered + sanded.
looked like a bag of ****.
i kept smashing it on the road and eventually bent some valves and broke a few cam caps

scraped it for 75 pounds

current car Fiat bravo hgt 155 20v

bought some Bk alloys for it couldnt get them on bcoz the brake discs locking studs wouldnt accomodate the alloys so took them out,, so the wheels kept coming loose when was driving. had a power bar with me always to stop and tighten them up every 30 or so miles

then it turned into a road legal track project

took the back seats out as you do. and then the rear carpets. then i put this terrible chequer plate fablon in the door cards.
the i put some neons under it and promptly rippped tore off when i came over a fly over abroad doing 110 and bottomed it out coz the front shocks where popped and leaking.

took the dash out and decided to bodge a custom dash together,
bought some fiberglass and black paint, and some perspex
3 x 52 mm from ebay. the tacho wasnt reading correct becoz it wouldnt read 5 cylinders accuratly. never found the fuel sender wire. temp worked fine.
eventually took the dash out completely the day i left the army and had original guages cable tied to cross member, by now everything interior has been binned and front carpets roofing matt. evevrything is gone. its horrible to drive things are rattly and its a bake bean can the misses used to call it. i sacked her for it haha

went to santa pod twice. 15.4 and a bit........... 3rd time lucky NAH

a week before santa i had to drive to leeds 200 miles

oil was a bit low. i was skint. tappets were annoying me.

bought some (mineral oil) for 7 quid and topped it up in tesco car park perfect NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

leeds and back fine.

santa pod weekend.
friday engines taping quite alot now. maybe its time to change the oil
60 quid + filter nothing changes.

saturday engine is so tappety now i put it on my ramps and have a good old look.

decide to take the sump off as i suspect a bearing caps is loose,
half a day spent trying to get it off before i realise you cant take it off still in the car,
sunday. wake up 6 am (right im going santa pod anyway+
15 miles down the road the tapping is now CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK and the car is screaming

coast into a services and pull all the plugs. test the compression and 3 and 4 are zero with and needle jerks slightly when i turn the motor

an hour later in limp mode and im back home with a engine crane.
take everything out, trying to get the inlet manifold off for 3 hours before i decide it cant be done.. angle grinder and cut the exhaust in half as nuts were finished

trying to split the box from the motor
2 hours before i realise u need to sort the drive shafts out before u can drop anything

i just crack the box from motor and think damn im tired il go and have a sit down, end up falling asleep wake up at 11 pm and its pissing it down with rain. hammering it was

windows open in the car, bonnet open, head and cams+ inlet manifold + injectors open to the rain . extension lead out in the rain and its live tho not anymore coz its tripped the garage electrics. tool boxes open and full 6 inches with water.. great stuff and the oil tray with my 60 quid new oil is over flowed with rain by now. its an act of god becz its raining still 8 hours later.... i must be really stupid or something... can anyone recommed a car that might suit my style ... maybe something with a little more space to work in under the bonnet. or maybe ishouldnt be uunder the bonnet of any car at all...
 
Last edited:
When I bought my K&N induction kit, I knew nothing about cars.

However it came with "simple instructions", so I figured it would be easy enough.

It showed that I needed to saw a bit of the bumper off to put the pipe through, and also had a fuzzy thing in the background which looked like you needed to cut a square out of it.

Of course, it didn't mean that at all - that fuzzy thing was the radiator, which I happily hacksawed through, only realising something was wrong when green fluid started pouring all over the floor... :ROFLMAO:

1 bottle of Ragweld later and all was good again - but just incase, I had to get a new rad fitted... best however many hundred (I forget) pounds I ever spent.... hahaha
 
When I bought my K&N induction kit, I knew nothing about cars.

However it came with "simple instructions", so I figured it would be easy enough.

It showed that I needed to saw a bit of the bumper off to put the pipe through, and also had a fuzzy thing in the background which looked like you needed to cut a square out of it.

Of course, it didn't mean that at all - that fuzzy thing was the radiator, which I happily hacksawed through, only realising something was wrong when green fluid started pouring all over the floor... :ROFLMAO:

1 bottle of Ragweld later and all was good again - but just incase, I had to get a new rad fitted... best however many hundred (I forget) pounds I ever spent.... hahaha

:ROFLMAO: Thats funny :p. If you were American you could have sued them! (y)
 
When I bought my K&N induction kit, I knew nothing about cars.

However it came with "simple instructions", so I figured it would be easy enough.

It showed that I needed to saw a bit of the bumper off to put the pipe through, and also had a fuzzy thing in the background which looked like you needed to cut a square out of it.

Of course, it didn't mean that at all - that fuzzy thing was the radiator, which I happily hacksawed through, only realising something was wrong when green fluid started pouring all over the floor... :ROFLMAO:

1 bottle of Ragweld later and all was good again - but just incase, I had to get a new rad fitted... best however many hundred (I forget) pounds I ever spent.... hahaha


haha that made me laugh. theres a lot of scary stories out there.. lets here them guys .....just bought another bravo today 1.8 hlx again
will i ever learn £ 200 quid well spent. nothing seems wrong with it either at teh mo
 
for me it had to be using 20 yr old tractor engine oil which was like black thick sludge in my Alfa with a knackered bottom end to sell it on! :eek:.

And I did the usual bodge on a mk2 punto with the wiper linkage problem using cable ties.

I always keep cable ties in the car as it's amazing when they come in handy :D.
 
Last edited:
:eek: you used the B word. iv just lost my HGT to a bearing cap if u didnt read only a few days ago,,, so gutted,,, bet the new alfa owner wasnt too c,hirpy when it clunked either.
 
About 20 years ago, a franchised dealer cut the front panel on a Ferrari to change the cam belt instead of taking the engine out.
 
I had agreed to trade in an old mk2 astra and before i got to the garage a piston ring went. I poured an entire bottle of stopsmoke into the cylinder through the plug hole and it ran the best the car had ever ran.
Week later took the new car back for some repairs and the sales guy told me he was going to give me my old car to use as a courtesy car for a few hours, that was until the young lad who worked there at the weekends had got in it and thrashed it causing a piston ring to go. It was so hard to keep a straight face as he was telling me.
 
Last edited:
Being an old git & working on old Ford Cortinas years ago, one fault they had was noisy rear diffs. A more often than not fix, was to put nylons in the noisy diff. They eventually fused to the internals & did indeed quieten things down:D Well for a while anyway.:D
 
these stories are why i never want to buy another car... i know whats wrong/isnt with mine.

never done anything like this to my cars. worst ive ever done is attach a air filter with a cable tie for a few days lol.
 
Back
Top